‘Corn-Fed’ White Boys

Weird thoughts: Do ‘corn-fed’ cattle suffer from high blood glucose problems? Do dairy cows that are ‘corn-fed’ produce sweeter milk? Does that have anything to do with my having been warned off of milk as well, causing me to have to take Vitamin D supplements now? And finally, if milk produced by ‘corn-fed’ Iowa cows really is sweeter, than how does that effect the taste of Wisconsin cheese made from that milk? Yeah, I’m not supposed to eat cheese either, dammit!

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Damned If We Do…

In the pursuit of happiness, adopting the roles presented to us may seem to be just the on-ramp we’re looking for to the success we both want and need. But, deep down, I think we all know that we can never get off the “road to hell” we’re actually on that way.

What’s My Motivation?

The title to this post is from a recurring joke in my internal dialog, originating from some long-forgotten line in a movie about acting. In case you haven’t noticed, a major underlying theme of this blog is my confusion about (and outright resentment towards) the stupid roles we’re all forced to play in order to “fit in” with those around us.

Bookends?

I wonder. Could it be that living with such doubt in our minds is the very reason why we humans have always craved the comfort and support, imagined or not, of life in a community? In the end, I don’t know. I also don’t know if my paranoia, by isolating me from the “evil” influence of others, has actually helped me through the years, or if maybe, just maybe, a few more “Gibbs slaps” from others might well have done me some good…

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We all have memories we’d rather not dwell on. Memories of decisions we’ve made that have haunted us ever since. And I think we all wonder how things might have been different had we, or others, made different choices.

Reflections Between The Lines…

How could I have been so insane, so arrogant, as to think I could actually achieve, here, something so grand as to demand your recognition, all the while knowing it would require of me the kind of courage I’d never been able to muster before. And yet, in the midst of this terrible sense of failure, I can’t help but miss the effort…

Surprise! Surprise! Surprise!

Hell, even I, during my oddly-reversed-yet-weirdly-the-same version of Lloyd Bridges’ “Steve McCroskey” character from the movie Airplane!, have spent a year and a half studiously avoiding reflections of my own nightmarish fears of just WTF might be on the horizon…