Perspective… Restored!

“Loving can cost a lot but not loving always costs more, and those who fear to love often find that want of love is an emptiness that robs the joy from life.”

– Merle Shain

“Once I knew only darkness and stillness…my life was without past or future…but a little word from the fingers of another fell into my hand that clutched at emptiness, and my heart leaped to the rapture of living.”

– Helen Keller

“Emptiness quotes & quotations” – Thinkexist.com

I’m not sure whether it’s “time heals all wounds” or “time wounds all heels” that applies best to me, but I suppose it’s a matter of perspective. All I know is that, beginning with Memorial Day weekend, I became so fixated on the relative “emptiness” of my life that it put me into one of the worst “funks” I’ve been through in recent memory – one that finally started to lift, as mysteriously as it began, early on Friday morning.

My relief was so great that I actually felt good enough to make that two mile plus round trip walk to the grocery store. And even though it wasn’t even sprinkling when I left, but pouring pretty much all the way back, my mood was still so good that I was even able to appreciate the amazing response by the plant life to receiving some much needed rain.

So what broke the “spell” I was under? Well, the answer to that one is as hard to get a handle on as the one asking what, exactly, it was that brought it on. I’m sure that one contributing factor was all the science-based programming I’ve been watching on TV. After all, nothing puts things in perspective like seeing how “small” my problems are in the “grand scheme of things”… right?

But the thing is, however, that even after “mind expanding” beauties like this…

… And the really cool Sizes of the Universe Poster Kyle Hill included in his THE UNIVERSE IS GARGANTUAN {Infographic} post, PLUS the fully animated and totally mind blowing version of that graphic called Magnifying the Universe (damn, I wish I could embed that!)…

… My mind was more fixated on that “emptiness” thing than ever. Hell, every atom, that everything in the universe is made of, is damned near ALL EMPTY SPACE! How’s THAT for perspective?!?! 😯

But then I remembered the lyrics to one of my favorite songs – by the one band that always clicks with me, and that’s what finally restored a proper perspective: 😎

I’m gonna close with Mary Shannon’s (Mary McCormack) last “voiceover” quote from the series finale of In Plain Sight, which I’ve also added to my In Plain Sight post:

Mary: [ending voiceover] “Nobody likes letting go. From our earliest moments, from birth until we’re six feet under, our instinct is to grab, grip, cling to a finger, bottle, best friend, to a faded old racing form. Sometimes we hold on for dear life to the very things that keep us from living it, but that comes with an upside. It’s the way we feel when we finally let go. The trick, I guess, is to not find a way around the curveballs life serves up, but to live with them; a halfway happy, uneasy alliance, and to search for new things to cling to, and when you finally find them to hang on just as tight. And around and around we go, holding on until the time comes to say goodbye, and like it or not, ready or not, you have to accept one universal truth: life is messy. Always and for all of us. But a wise man once said, maybe messy is what you need, and I think you might be right.”

I finally got around to watching that finale from my DVR just the other day, along with the probable series finale of Harry’s Law. And guess what? I actually survived! But I’m not counting any chicks just yet, because I’ve still got the last two episodes of House and Sherlock to watch – along with lots of other stuff taking up 80% of my DVR’s capacity! 😯

I want ice water.

Related: Size Matters… « BuddhaKat

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37 thoughts on “Perspective… Restored!

  1. Wow. I’m feeling very small and alone right now. I’ve sought space to grow, and finally have it — far too much of it. I’d like to close some of the space again. Just a little. Maybe. And I’ve no idea how to do it. Walk too far down a road alone and you’ll be too tired to get back.You forget the way back. Makes me wonder if I’ll live long enough to figure out this “life” thing. Total isolation was never really the goal, but that’s almost what I’ve achieved. Oh well, not sure where all that came from or where I was going with it.

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  2. I’m glad you’re feeling better. Now, here’s something to ponder which the Tourettes Squirrel reminded me…. If someone has Tourette’s Syndrome, but has never ever heard a bad cuss word in their life, what words would they then “spit” out???

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  3. Boy do I know this feeling. And no matter how much we KNOW we are not alone in this world, that at least one other person is going through the same shit and feelings we are; we still THINK we are. Btw I’m glad to know I’m not the only one that makes a trek of 2 miles to the grocery store on foot.

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    • You know Bats, the wonderful response I’ve received for this post (not to mention all those comments on previous posts I’ve yet to answer) has proven to me beyond all doubt that I am, indeed, not alone. And yet, here I am, stressing over the combination of a sudden resurgence of whatever the fuck is plaguing my guts and the fact that I need to return to the grocers again ASAP – for more OTC “remedies” if for nothing else. However, having downed what I had left an hour or so ago, attempting to do so on foot seems just a tad unwise. Hell, I don’t think it would be wise even if my son actually came through to take me as promised for once! 😳

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  4. I have been reading and watching “end of the world” related books and movies lately…just because, not for any deeper purpose, mind. And I came across this little gem of a movie with an all-star cast, Melancholia. I thought it would depress me but it didn’t. It was kind of soothing so I guess that pins me as a weirdo. Here’s a preview, IM. It might soothe you too? 🙂

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    • Wow ZM, that trailer is so very nice! And also very reminiscent of the TV show called Touch – that I haven’t actually seen, but have the entire season of sitting on my DVR! 😳

      Here’s its trailer:

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      • I wanted to watch that show! It looked so good, the premise is wild. I rarely get to the tv but my husband loved it. When you finally get around to watching it I think you’ll be in for a nice ride. I Love Kiefer. He can do no wrong…:)

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  5. Pingback: “Natural Progression” – a SIX WORD STORY… « BuddhaKat

  6. hi, IzaakMak… thanks for the pingback… now having read this, and relating to our earlier discussion, I see with much pleasure, how creative (and resilient) you are. This is a beauty of a post, and I’m going right back to mine to pingback to yours here, there. (If you succeeded in understanding/following that wayward sentence you get bonus points)!!!
    You also get points for the self-analysis sharing. I’m just not as comfortable (yet) with that, as you seem to be. Not really sure (‽‽‽‽) if I want to be, either. However, I will say that my med pros and I are adjusting my meds, such that the depressive episodes of my bipolarity are less often stronger than I am. And, for me, that end of the spectrum, rather than aloneness or emptiness, is a demotivating “what’s the point” funk. Even about the manic, or stuff that brings me joy.
    However, your post inspired me to publish a silly little, synchronistic weird piece of my creative self http://wp.me/p1yc93-py (almost as discombobulating as the above mentioned self-analysis sharing). And, speaking of synchronicity/coincidence, I prefer to think in terms of the old faithful: “great minds think alike” quote by the ever popular, all wise Anonymous.

    Hope you had a positive outcome in the “getting back to the galactically distant grocery store”!

    Sorry for taking up so much of your space/time here, but I’ll close now, saying you are a pretty terrific and lucky guy with some pretty terrific friends and interests.

    🙂
    g’nite

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    • Once again, you’ve proven my assessment of your being a great person right Janet. I absolutely loved your “synchronistic weird piece!” Apparently “great minds think alike” indeed! 😀

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  7. Pingback: Size Matters… « BuddhaKat

    • Thanks Frank. I’m embracing and enjoying for all I’m worth! 😀

      However, and paraphrasing a quote entirely out of context: “My arms are too short to box with God!” 😆

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  8. Love the Mary Shannon/Mary McCormack’s finale to your post! I miss that show.
    I’m glad to hear you were able to get out of that little funk you were in. Maybe I just need to watch some more PBS science shows to get a bit more a grasp on my own ‘messy.’ Yes, it’s all relative, but can be so consuming when it is just us and the grocery store and the long road that separates us. Still feel that way. Now I just drive.
    Take care!

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    • Mary’s “voiceover” quotes were some of the best I’ve ever heard. And the “relativity” of things can indeed be very consuming. But being deeply wrapped up in the mysteries of life is kinda what makes it so worthwhile. Thanks! 😀

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