Monday Morning Funnies

Here is the latest bit of hilarity forwarded to my Inbox by my friend Rosie:

A Practical Example Of How The Human Mind Works

Analysis of the above picture can tell us a lot about how different people think.

- For young men, it’s a picture of a lady with a nice derriere but only the most observant will notice that she is crossing a street.

- The really observant will notice that she is wearing a thong.

- For older men, she appears to be a respectable woman – with a nice tush – on her way to work.

- The perverts among them will imagine her naked.

- Wiser men will ponder the presence of mind of the photographer to take the shot in the face of such beauty and be grateful that they shared it.

- For half of the women, this is an ordinary woman who should not have left home dressed that way.

- The other half will think she is a slut but wonder where she bought that blouse

- Older women will imagine the misery that the woman’s curves will cause by the time she reaches 50.

- But only children, the extremely intelligent, and the celibate will notice that the taxi is being driven by a dog!

Wow, I don’t know if I should have my eyes checked or my mind flushed, because I did NOT see that coming! :shock:

I want ice water.

More E-Mail Funnies

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Posted in booty, dogs, e-mail, humor, men, sexy images, thinking outside the box, vision test, women | Tagged | 21 Comments

Sunday Spectacular

Just some beautiful imagery today, to show my appreciation for the world I love so much.


Via The Blue Marble, 2012 Style: Big Pic « Discovery News


Via Earth Day: Putting Our Planet in Celestial Perspective « Discovery News


Via Stunning Time-Lapse Video of Yosemite National Park « Discovery News

Finally, lots of people posted about the recent solar storm activity and the amazing auroral displays it produced. Here are a couple of the many videos I ran across:


Via Aurora Borealis Timelapse, january 2012 on Vimeo on Vimeo


Via Time lapse – Aurora Borealis January 2012 on Vimeo on Vimeo

More coverage of the solar storms and auroras at:

Dance of the Spirits. Real Time Aurora footage. on Vimeo

Solar Storm in Progress! « Lights in the Dark

Aurora and the Largest Solar Storm in 6 Years « Metousiosis

Stunning Auroras From Around the World (January 22-23, 2012) « Universe Today

Solar Maxima 2012 « Zazen Life

I want ice water.

More Visual Treats

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Posted in Auroras, beauty, Earth from space, gigya shortcode, inspiration, nature, solar storms, The Blue Marble, time lapse photography, Vimeo, Yosemite | Tagged | 15 Comments

Isn’t Life Strange?

Because of my desire to watch the ongoing Australian Open tennis tournament, and the residual fear of being bug-bit while I slept, I’d been avoiding taking my prescribed sleeping meds. But I was hurting so bad last night (from built up tension?) that I decided my body really, really needed the rest. Besides, the Women’s Final between Victoria Azarenka and Maria Sharapova promised to be such a scream-fest that I thought it best to just record it for viewing some time today.

Anyway… the night that followed included one of the most interesting dream sequences I’ve had in a very long time. First of all, those who have followed this blog will know how much I love to sing and how being a professional singer has always been one of my greatest fantasies. Secondly, those who have followed this blog will also know that the posts I’ve written about dreams tend to include the music of The Moody Blues and/or Justin Hayward & John Lodge (The Moody Blues lead singers).

Well, last night’s dream(s) started with an agent overhearing me singing The Moody Blues’ Melancholy Man (from A Question of Balance) and went on to include my singing, on stage, too many of my favorite songs to remember…

I remember waking up at one point, overwhelmed with excitement, and immediately decided to go back to sleep in the hopes that there would be more. And there was so much more, concluding with Nights in White Satin and Isn’t Life Strange

To me, the amazing thing about these dreams was the fact that I could sing all those wonderful songs without breaking down emotionally and having to stop. I can’t remember a time when I could do that in my waking life – including today, as I sorted through the songs I wanted to include in this post.

But performing them as I’ve always wanted, in my dreams at least, sure was nice… :)

I want ice water.

More The Moody Blues posts

More Justin Hayward & John Lodge posts

More from the My Life volume

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Posted in dreams, emotions, fantasy, Justin Hayward & John Lodge, lyrics, medication, music, singing, sleep, The Moody Blues, YouTube | Tagged | 10 Comments

The Clash Of Titanic Phobias

I’m sure that at least a few of you have been wondering where the hell I’ve been. Well it’s all very embarrassing to be honest, but I will attempt to explain as best I can. Are you at all familiar with the The Irresistible Force Paradox? You know, the one that goes like this:

“What happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object?”

Well I sort of lived out my own version of that paradox over the last couple of months – like so:

1. A mentally ill man (who’s “problems” include both extreme social anxiety and an extreme insect phobia) goes off his medications for well over a year and becomes an “immovable” urban hermit.

2. That urban hermit has his sanctuary threatened by a seemingly “unstoppable” invasion of bed bugs?

So what happens when these two things meet? As it turns out, disturbingly like this:

I didn’t know it at the time, but my nightmare began sometime in mid to late November with a rare visit from a relative and his friend. By the end of the first week in January, after apparently repeated failures by me (and the guy my apartment management sent to investigate) to kill off the bugs, and with growing anxiety over the boatload work required to meet my management’s “pre-treatment” requirements, I had become a delusional (from getting almost no sleep for weeks), panic stricken lunatic.

Then, early on the morning of January 6th, after passing out at my desk (the only place I felt comfortable trying to sleep), I awoke in an all-out panic attack with uncontrollable shakes and had to be taken to the emergency room… :shock:

Tilt!


At least I didn’t kill anyone!

The emergency room doctors determined that I was in desperate need of psychiatric treatment and had me transferred to the VA hospital, where I was locked away on an “acute” psychiatric ward (with all its associated wonders) until I convinced the doctors there to release me on January 17 (after 11 days total).

I say “convinced” because my doctors were very concerned that returning to the same environment would simply lead me to another breakdown, and thus right back into their care. But I pointed out that the relief I got from being away from that environment and back on my meds was rapidly being overwhelmed by the dual strains of being locked on a psych ward – surrounded by some really, really sick people – and the knowledge that the situation at home will still be there no matter how long I avoid it.

Anyway… As it turns out, the bug killing measures I’d taken before my collapse weren’t entirely in vain, because I haven’t seen a single one since I got home. Nevertheless, I completed enough of the massive preparation work required by the management (with which I received absolutely no help from anyone) to get the first of two full-scale exterminations done, and things are looking better and better by the day. The second treatment will be in a few days and then only the bill will remain to be dealt with.

In the end, reality has proven the paradox false once again. As for how this nightmare can be apportioned to the realms of “real” and “imagined,” I truly do not know. But it is very clear that allowing my mental illness to go untreated leaves me more vulnerable than I ever want to be again!

I want ice water.

More from the My Life volume

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Posted in anxiety, bed bugs, delusion, depression, emergency, fear, isolation, medication, mental health, nightmares, phobias, psychosis, YouTube | Tagged | 35 Comments

Hey, It’s 2012!

Happy New Year Everyone!

First, a big Thank You to WordPress.com for this very cool 2011 annual stats report:

Here’s an excerpt:

Madison Square Garden can seat 20,000 people for a concert. This blog was viewed about 64,000 times in 2011. If it were a concert at Madison Square Garden, it would take about 3 sold-out performances for that many people to see it.

Click here to see the complete report

Next, the best of the images I’ve been collecting for days:

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

And finally, since it is 2012

The Mayans are coming! I'm Squared!

… I’ll include that damned song after all:

I want ice water.

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Posted in animated GIFs, doomsday, Europe (the band), humor, lyrics, Mayan calendar, music, New Year, Year 2011, YouTube | Tagged | 31 Comments

My Look Back At 2011

Holy crap! I just realized that it’s already 2112 in Samoa and I still haven’t posted the big “Year In Review” thing I’d been planning. So, in a bit of a desperate rush I’m afraid, I’ve selected these videos, from the small mountain of choices I’ve stockpiled, as best representing my important memories of 2011:

Now I know y’all are planning on some big time celebrating tonight, but in light of the Mayan prediction that this will be your last New Year’s Eve, I thought you might like some “partying” advice from these experts from the last big End-Of-The-World scare:

Hey, quit your whining. I could’ve chosen The Final Countdown! :D

I want ice water.

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Posted in humor, JibJab, lyrics, music, news, politics, Prince, space travel, technology, Year 2011, YouTube | Tagged | 32 Comments